Why doctors drink
Mr. Badhair: "I'm here because I want to see an aneurysm specialist."Dr. Grumpy: "Well, sir, I certainly can discuss them, but I'm a neurologist, not a neurosurgeon. So I can't claim to specialize in them."Mr. Badhair: "Well, on your office website it says you do, and that you trained at UBS."Dr. Grumpy: "Sir, I'm not an aneurysm specialist, I've never made that claim, and I didn't train at UBS. I went to BSU."Mr. Badhair: "Liar! I can't believe you have the nerve to tell me that! I saw it on your site this morning!"I call up my practice site and turn the iMac around.Dr. Grumpy: "Sir, this is my site. It clearly says I wen...
Source: Doctor Grumpy in the House - February 18, 2014 Category: Neurologists Authors: Grumpy, M.D. Source Type: blogs
Dear WebCME,
I understand you're trying to do a medical education tie-in with Valentine's day, but perhaps next year you should stick with something a little less heartwarming:Thank you, Tab! (Source: Doctor Grumpy in the House)
Source: Doctor Grumpy in the House - February 17, 2014 Category: Neurologists Authors: Grumpy, M.D. Source Type: blogs
Patient quote of the day
"I have to accept that I'm 40. That means I'm not 39 anymore." (Source: Doctor Grumpy in the House)
Source: Doctor Grumpy in the House - February 14, 2014 Category: Neurologists Authors: Grumpy, M.D. Source Type: blogs
Bwahahahaha
Dr. Grumpy: "Didn't you have a hysterectomy?"Mrs. Giggle: "Yes, why do you ask?"Dr. Grumpy: "Just to be safe. This medication can cause birth defects."Mrs. Giggle: "Oh, that's not a problem. My birth defects are both in high school." (Source: Doctor Grumpy in the House)
Source: Doctor Grumpy in the House - February 13, 2014 Category: Neurologists Authors: Grumpy, M.D. Source Type: blogs
Great speech therapy reports
(Source: Doctor Grumpy in the House)
Source: Doctor Grumpy in the House - February 12, 2014 Category: Neurologists Authors: Grumpy, M.D. Source Type: blogs
Life is a highway
Mr. Octane: "I need a note saying I had a doctor's appointment."Dr. Grumpy: "Okay, for your job?"Mr. Octane: "No, for the police."Dr. Grumpy: "The police?"Mr. Octane: "I got a speeding ticket on the way here."Dr. Grumpy: "I don't write notes for that."Mr. Octane: "If I hadn't been speeding I would have been late."Dr. Grumpy: "You came in 15 minutes after your scheduled appointment time."Mr. Octane: "Well, I would have been later." (Source: Doctor Grumpy in the House)
Source: Doctor Grumpy in the House - February 11, 2014 Category: Neurologists Authors: Grumpy, M.D. Source Type: blogs
Stating the obvious
Last year, for those of you who missed it, a large potato-chip company had a nationwide contest to come up with a new flavor.So, although the contest is over, there are still some bags of chips announcing the results out there. Yesterday, at a Boy Scout meeting, some bags were opened and I noticed this on one. It showed the top 5 ingredient suggestions people had sent in for a new potato chip flavor:I want to know how "potato" is the 2nd most popular ingredient suggestion. I mean, they're freakin' potato chips! While I like bacon, it's certainly not the first ingredient I think of if someone says "what should we use to mak...
Source: Doctor Grumpy in the House - February 10, 2014 Category: Neurologists Authors: Grumpy, M.D. Source Type: blogs
Ironic placement of a promoted tweet
(Source: Doctor Grumpy in the House)
Source: Doctor Grumpy in the House - February 8, 2014 Category: Neurologists Authors: Grumpy, M.D. Source Type: blogs
Patient Quote of the Day
"I have very little memory that I forgot that, whatever it was." (Source: Doctor Grumpy in the House)
Source: Doctor Grumpy in the House - February 7, 2014 Category: Neurologists Authors: Grumpy, M.D. Source Type: blogs
CME har de har har
(Source: Doctor Grumpy in the House)
Source: Doctor Grumpy in the House - February 7, 2014 Category: Neurologists Authors: Grumpy, M.D. Source Type: blogs
Tonight on National Geographic
These majestic creatures are some of the most faithful, devoted, servants a medical office will ever have. They endure daily burdens. They get twisted, tilted, leaned upon, smashed into desks and filing cabinets, and never complain about their lot in life.Eventually, as happens to all things, their time comes to an end. Sometimes they tilt too far. Or stop rolling. Or dump their once-loyal masters one too many times.And then, because no one seems to ever want to take them outside, or thinks that someday they'll have time to fix them, they go to their final, secretive, resting place:This picture is a rare peek at the myster...
Source: Doctor Grumpy in the House - February 6, 2014 Category: Neurologists Authors: Grumpy, M.D. Source Type: blogs
Attitude
Dr. Grumpy: "Also, since you had a seizure, you'll have to stop driving for 2 months."Mrs. Imspecial: "That's ridiculous. My husband is a doctor."Dr. Grumpy: "Yes, but that doesn't change anything. The law is pretty clear. No driving until you've been seizure-free for 60 days."Mrs. Imspecial: "I'm married to a doctor. You work with him at the hospital. I'm sure there's some exemption you can get for me."Dr. Grumpy: "No, there isn't. The only thing that matters here is that you had a seizure."Mrs. Imspecial: "I'm very busy with our kids, and don't have time for such nonsense. My husband is a doctor."Dr. Grumpy: "That doesn'...
Source: Doctor Grumpy in the House - February 4, 2014 Category: Neurologists Authors: Grumpy, M.D. Source Type: blogs
Font issues
Dear Biogen,Thank you for your Avonex demo pack.In a recent nonscientific survey, 8 out of 11 people thought the C and L were a little too close together, and read the box somewhat differently. (Source: Doctor Grumpy in the House)
Source: Doctor Grumpy in the House - February 3, 2014 Category: Neurologists Authors: Grumpy, M.D. Source Type: blogs
Relevance
Dr. Grumpy: "Any major illnesses run in your family?"Mr. Heme: "My grandmother once had a blood clot in her nose. It was really gross, too. With snot and everything." (Source: Doctor Grumpy in the House)
Source: Doctor Grumpy in the House - January 31, 2014 Category: Neurologists Authors: Grumpy, M.D. Source Type: blogs
2:17 a.m.
My cell phone rings.Dr. Grumpy: "This is Dr. Grumpy."Officer Peel: "Hi, doctor, this is Officer Peel, of the Grumpyville police. Sorry to wake you."Dr. Grumpy: "What can I do for you?"Officer Peel: "Do you know a lady named Dee Mentia?"Dr. Grumpy: "Yes, she's one of my patients. Actually, she's in Local Hospital at the moment, with pneumonia."Officer Peel: "Yeah, she keeps calling 911 from her hospital room and says she's being held hostage in your basement."Dr. Grumpy: "Oh my..." (starts laughing) "Do you need to come search my basement?"Officer Peel: "Nah, but can you do something to stop her? The 911 operators are busy ...
Source: Doctor Grumpy in the House - January 30, 2014 Category: Neurologists Authors: Grumpy, M.D. Source Type: blogs
