Metaphors of Self-talk
I love using metaphors in writing
and therapy. They’re powerful tools to engage the unconscious mind and change
our thinking without even realizing it’s happening. Fact is, we often think and
self-talk in metaphor without knowing
it, so we might as well intentionally use ones which are positive and promote transformation.
A while back a
client described a binge she’d had as “falling into a hole,” after which she
gradually returned to “normal” eating. Let’s take a look at her metaphor. What
sensory sensations and emotional reactions does this image generate in you? Holes
are often deep and dark ...
Source: Normal Eating - September 27, 2013 Category: Eating Disorders Authors: eatnormalnow Source Type: blogs
Hope Is Not A Plan
While listening to an NPR program
on changing our thoughts about death and dying, one of the experts interviewed encouraged
listeners to become proactive in their lives, wisely admonishing that “hope is
not a plan.” I couldn’t agree more. How often do I hear clients and Food and Feelings message
board members express their hopes without strategies to transform them into
reality.
And how do you think that turns
out? Without a plan, outcomes are generally poor, and disregulated eaters feel
like failures. For example, say, you’ve been eating relatively “normally” for a
couple of months and are about to...
Source: Normal Eating - September 23, 2013 Category: Eating Disorders Authors: eatnormalnow Source Type: blogs
Body Posture and Cravings
Disregulated eaters often find that
tips and techniques in managing cravings are as useful as understanding what
drives unwanted eating. We know that our mental attitude affects how we feel in
our bodies and vice versa, but what about our posture? Could that affect our emotions and actions
around food? Turns out that it might.
In “The right stance can be
reassuring” (Sarasota Herald-Tribune,
6/11/13, Health and Fitness, p. 7E), Kate Murphy reports that “expansive
postures release a flood of hormones that make you feel more positive and at
ease. Striking a commanding pose can change how you perceive you...
Source: Normal Eating - September 20, 2013 Category: Eating Disorders Authors: eatnormalnow Source Type: blogs
The Benefits of Cultivating an Interior Life
Talking to a friend who remarked
that her sister seemed to have little, if any, interior life, I realized how
seldom this phrase is heard nowadays and or used outside of clinical circles.
Yet, having a rich “interior life” may be key to finding meaning and happiness
in our existence and undoubtedly promotes emotional health and “normal”
eating.
What does it mean to have a rich
interior life? People who have one reflect on themselves and their place in the
world with curiosity, not judgment. They engage with ideas and wonder a great
deal. They spend time musing and mulling over, which is not the same...
Source: Normal Eating - September 16, 2013 Category: Eating Disorders Authors: eatnormalnow Source Type: blogs
Nix the Fat Talk
Much as I encourage clients and Food and Feelings message
board members to speak their minds, I draw the line at fat talk which
involves putting your body or someone else’s down because it is fat, large, or
unshapely. This kind of talk is dangerous to self-esteem and mental health.
Fortunately, we all can play a part in ending it.
Psychological researchers define
fat talk as “body-denigrating conversation between girls and women” (Sarasota Herald-Tribune, 6/4/13, “‘Fat
talk’ can carry a steep cost” by Jan Hoffman, Health and Fitness, p. 28E). Of
course, men can take part in these exchanges as well...
Source: Normal Eating - September 13, 2013 Category: Eating Disorders Authors: eatnormalnow Source Type: blogs
Thoughts on Abusers and Victims
Reading a book written on the
origins of war (BLOOD OF THE BELOVED by Mary Coleman), I was struck by two
useful concepts about aggression which seemed relevant to the population I
often serve: victims of physical abuse who become disregulated eaters. If you
fit this description, I hope these ideas speed your recovery.
If you feel defective or “bad” as a
result of having been physically abused by a parent, it’s time to stop blaming
yourselves. A 2006 study (“Neural mechanisms of genetic risk for impulsivity
and violence in humans,” Meryeer-Lindenberg et als, Proceedings of the
National Academy of Scie...
Source: Normal Eating - September 9, 2013 Category: Eating Disorders Authors: eatnormalnow Source Type: blogs
Mood and Unhealthy Foods
Although some disregulated eaters
head toward food when they’re in a good mood, most emotional eating is done
when we feel crummy. If you think that eating unhealthy food makes you feel
better, think again. Research says it ain’t necessarily so.
Penn State researchers did a small
study on 131 women to assess their moods before and after eating unhealthy
foods, those high in salt, sugar, and saturated fat (Tufts Health and Nutrition
Newsletter, 6/13, v. 31 #4). Their results: “If the women were in a bad mood” before
they ate unhealthy food, eating made them feel even worse. Those who were in a
good mood b...
Source: Normal Eating - September 6, 2013 Category: Eating Disorders Authors: eatnormalnow Source Type: blogs
Abuse and Eating Problems
This study revealed that “national
surveys suggest that more than a third of girls in the US experience some
degree of physical or sexual abuse before they reach adulthood.” It also widened the range of abuse-related eating
problems to include bingeing and food obsessions, rather than only obesity,
anorexia, and bulimia.
Wondering what constitutes abuse? Here
are the study’s criteria: Sexual abuse was characterized as “sexual touching”
or “forced sexual activity.” Physical abuse was described as “mild (being
pushed, grabbed, or shoved at any frequency or being kicked, bitten, or punched
once or ...
Source: Normal Eating - August 30, 2013 Category: Eating Disorders Authors: eatnormalnow Source Type: blogs
Why Focus on the Past?
We all talk about “the past,”
whether we’re reminiscing about events that happened decades ago or relating an
incident that occurred yesterday. I have no quarrel with talking about what has
already happened—as long as you know why you’re doing it. Too often, however, I
hear discussions about childhoods and personal history that make me wonder what
their purpose is. Why do you talk
about “the past”?
Sometimes we look to our history to
fondly remember people, places, and events, intentionally recalling our graduation
from college, a big date, home-coming of a new puppy, a child’s first word, or
...
Source: Normal Eating - August 26, 2013 Category: Eating Disorders Authors: eatnormalnow Source Type: blogs
Doctors' Bias Against Obese Confirmed
If you’re overweight or obese, you
may have had the experience of not getting the attention you need at medical
visits. A recent Journal of Academic
Medicine study confirms why (Time/Health
and Family online, “Medical students may already be biased against obese
patients” by Alexandra Sifferlin, 5/24/13). Yes, there’s bias against you, but
that’s no excuse for not getting the medical care you require and deserve.
The study “shows that two out of
five medical students have a subconscious bias against obese people…and that
this way of thinking can appear before doctors even start to treat patients...
Source: Normal Eating - August 23, 2013 Category: Eating Disorders Authors: eatnormalnow Source Type: blogs
What Means the Most to You?
Disregulated eaters often are not
merely unhappy with their eating but with their lives. In fact, sometimes this
every day dissatisfaction is what drives them to eat. In order to have a
satisfying life, you must know your values—What means a great deal to you? What
do you love above all else? What activities bring you the most happiest?
If you knew you were going to be
stranded on, say, an island for the rest of your life and had the opportunity
to choose what you wished to bring along with you, you’d want to make some
serious decisions. Rather than what you “feel like” taking, you’d want to think
...
Source: Normal Eating - August 19, 2013 Category: Eating Disorders Authors: eatnormalnow Source Type: blogs
Food and Eating Myths
I love good fiction, but when it
comes to eating and food, give me the unvarnished truth every time. Here are
some surprising facts on the subject from the Nutrition Action Newsletter (June, 2013). At least they’re
considered true for now, but who knows what will be when the next batch of scientific
studies come along.
Do emotional eaters only overeat
when they’re unhappy? According to the results of a Dutch study, they overeat when
they’re happy too. Study participants were shown upbeat and downbeat film
clips, offered sugary/salty/fatty foods and filled out pre-and
post-questionnaires about their moo...
Source: Normal Eating - August 16, 2013 Category: Eating Disorders Authors: eatnormalnow Source Type: blogs
Loneliness and Eating
Because I enjoy being validated as
much as the next person, I was gratified to read Jane Brody’s column, “Loneliness
can change your health for the worse” (Sarasota
Herald-Tribune, 5/21/13) which describes the connection between feeling
lonely and reaching for food. Understanding the connection will help you break
it, so read on.
Brody, a recovered emotional eater,
quotes psychologist John T. Cacioppo, co-author of the book, LONELINESS: “Loneliness
undermines people’s ability to self-regulate.” If you’ve read my blogs and
books about disregulation and self-regulation, you’ll understand what’s...
Source: Normal Eating - August 12, 2013 Category: Eating Disorders Authors: eatnormalnow Source Type: blogs
Addiction versus Habit
What’s the difference between
having a habit and having an addiction? It’s important to distinguish between
the two, which I don’t think disregulated eaters always do. I say this due to how often I hear them say that they’re addicted to food when I think they
really mean that they’re habituated to it.
Here’s an example. Recently I had
some medical tests that required abstention from coffee and lactose products, which meant not having my morning cup of java or
nightly yogurt while watching the late news. I knew from experience that I’d
have a wicked withdrawal headache without the coffee which is ad...
Source: Normal Eating - August 9, 2013 Category: Eating Disorders Authors: eatnormalnow Source Type: blogs
Thinking and Talking About Your Childhood
Coming from a therapist, it might
sound strange asking you to consider if you might think and talk too much about
the unhappiness you experienced growing up. Don’t therapists want you to open
up and examine your origins and history? Don’t you benefit from time-tunneling into
the shadowy events and murky corners of your childhood?
Well, yes and no. For example, say
you took a walk in the woods every morning and thoroughly enjoyed yourself. I’d
say that’s a wonderful way to start your day. However, if you had frequent
terrifying experiences in those same woods—being mauled by a bear, bitten by a
snake,...
Source: Normal Eating - August 5, 2013 Category: Eating Disorders Authors: eatnormalnow Source Type: blogs
