Kicking Off The Dirt!

I made an appointment with the therapist that my psychiatrist recommended today, set for Wednesday.  We'll see how this goes.  Not looking forward to it AT ALL.  I've been through this.  I know I will leave feeling I've divulged too much, I said things I shouldn't have said, things other people shouldn't know, I will feel guilt and remorse, that the therapist is judging me and now doesn't like me. I will have to talk about things I do not want to think about, she will make comments that will catch me off guard and you know?  Why do people do this?  Why?  It's torture.I've been thinking a lot about, symbolically, kicking the dirt off my boots.  Stop thinking about WHY people do things, what I did to them, why they act the way they do, say what they do.  Who cares?  Maybe I did something, maybe I didn't, but I'll never know unless they decide to tell me and I spend waaaay too much time worrying about it.  Kicking the dirt off meaning...just get the thoughts AND the people out of my life that bother me, life is too short and my mental health is too important.For instance, Mark's mother just has the most bizarre responses to emails and I can't figure them out and have stopped trying.  I actually stopped responded to her emails to both of us and decided she really was meaning to be sending the emails to Mark, not me, but was being polite and including me in the email.  I decided this after I replied, just to her...
Source: bipolar.and.me - Category: Mental Illness Source Type: blogs