When You're An Outsider In Your Family

You may think you’re the only one, but many people don’t think they fit in with their families, feeling as if they’re on the outside looking in. You may have had this sense since childhood or developed it later in life as you’ve grown emotionally healthier. Either way, a sense of not belonging may be disturbing, but it’s normal and even healthy. When we’re children, our families are our mainstay of acceptance and nurturance, all we have until we make friends and find other adults who can care for us. Oddly, clients who feel as if they’re outsiders with their families believe that there’s something wrong with them, although many are actually more mentally healthy than their families. It’s all in the perspective. Clients report that, unlike their parents or siblings, they were shy and introverted; creative or exceptionally serious; unconventional and non-conformist; curious, open-minded and inquisitive. When families aren’t accepting of members who are different, children grow up feeling as if there’s something wrong with them, that is, defective. Often, this identity carries into adulthood and they may continue to feel like an outsider with their families—and other groups—no matter how old they are.  Alternately, there are adults who felt as if they fit in fine with family as children, but who’ve changed so dramatically over time that they no longer experience that same sense of belonging. As mature adult, they even may wond...
Source: Normal Eating - Category: Eating Disorders Authors: Source Type: blogs